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Realization

I really should realize that dates cycle likely every 5 years. This time is really no different, excepting the fact that 5 years ago I would have been in Disney World this week during the trip from hell.

A month from today, I was dumped over the phone at work by the ex (other choice words removed from here for decency's sake). My boss gave me 2 days off with pay to recooperate. She was a very kind boss.

One would think that this should not still affect me, but it does in some ways. It's the only relationship I've had in my life, the one thing I have to compare against everything else; the thing that makes me absolutely petrified to put myself out there.

It also makes me very glad for the relationship I have now with paultucker, and reminds me that I should never take him for granted. He's made me laugh, smile and feel good about myself the entire time, and I can only hope that I've done the same for him. I appreciate, admire, respect, cherish and love him, and all the good he's brought into my life.

Paul makes me glad that I set aside most of those old, dark feelings to take a chance with him.

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
bludiscus
Nov. 10th, 2008 03:49 pm (UTC)
You very much deserve to laugh, smile and feel good about yourself. I'm glad that you're happy.
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )

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